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This also makes it easier, for example, to express your preferences to your partner and to guide him or her during sex. Some women also have trouble reaching orgasm through penetration alone. With a sex toy, the woman can also be stimulated clitorally and thus experience a climax. Using a toy together can also help you and your partner grow closer together.

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Vibrators can be used while masturbating, but are also often used by couples during foreplay or sex. Beyond bolstering emotional intimacy, “toys are a great asset to increase arousal,” says Jenni Skyler, PhD, a certified sex therapist based in Colorado. Using a sex toy can also help heterosexual couples close the orgasm gap, adds Deindorfer, which is the term used to describe the difference in frequency of orgasm when women and men have sex.

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Whether you’re looking to switch up your masturbation routine or spice up your sex life—a better orgasm for you is better for your partner, too. But with so many to choose from, you’re going to need help wading through the options. Cadell specifically recommends buying a sex toy cleaner (some toys don’t survive the dishwasher). She also says toys should be wrapped individually when stored because certain plastic and lube combinations can cause melting.

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